


I've Got You Mish

by saltyhunter



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Crying, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:27:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27658813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saltyhunter/pseuds/saltyhunter
Summary: I found this post on tumblr and was inspired to make a One Shot :I need a Cockles fic of Jensen visiting Misha after filming for 15x20 wraps and he’s so friggin upset because Misha wasn’t there because Cas wasn’t in it because they didn’t get the Destiel happy ending they wanted and they knew their characters deserved and he kisses Misha like he’s air and he hasn’t breathed properly since they started filming the finale and he breaks down crying and Misha holds him as they cuddle on the couch for a while and Misha kisses him tenderly and murmurs sweet assurances into his temple as Jensen nuzzles into his neck and tries to bury himself under the blanket because this year has been hard enough and that ending makes everything feel so much worse.
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Misha Collins
Comments: 14
Kudos: 106





	I've Got You Mish

**Author's Note:**

> I made some slight changes but it's the same idea. The tumblr user who posted the prompt is @hashtagteamfreewill and mine is @spndeservedbetter 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy and stay strong in these hard times.

Jensen had never thought that he could hate being on the set of Supernatural. Even when he was tired, he had always enjoyed working because the simple thought of the SPN family made him warm and fuzzy inside. But today, they wrapped up filming the last episode of a 15 year long journey and Misha wasn't there. Misha whose character, Angel of the Lord Castiel, shared a special bond with the fandom. 

When he'd received the script for the finale about a year ago, the first thing he did after reading it was call Misha. The phone had only rang once before his best friend and lover picked up.

"Hey, you." His voice sounded deeper than usual, Jensen immediately guessed that he received the news. He would not appear in the finale. Misha probably had fought against tears that threatened to flow like a river.

"Are you okay?" Jensen asked softly. 

Fucking dumb question. Of course he was not okay. Misha had invested twelve years of his life in a character that brought people comfort and happiness. He had poured out his soul in every line, every confused frown, every "I'll go with you Dean", every " I don't understand that reference". He had met fans during conventions and listened with gratitude when they talked about how Castiel had changed their life. After a hard day on set he would come to Jensen's trailer to ask about his acting. Because Misha always worried that he didn't deliver as good as him or Jared, even after twelve years he sometimes feared that he could ruin the show. And this feeling, this feeling of not belonging, this feeling of thinking himself less important to Supernatural than Jared or Jensen intensified whenever the writers decided to cut him off an episode for poor reasons. Misha had never told him that but Jensen had guessed. It was easy to guess if you paid attention, and if you cared, and if you loved Misha Collins. Jensen did all three.

Through the speakerphone, Misha let out a long sigh and Jensen felt his throat tighten. "I'm not gonna lie," Misha said in a voice so broken that he had wanted to rush over his house and tackle him in a bear hug. "It hurts, but it is what it is."

"No, fuck that," Jensen retorted. "They have no right to do this to you, I'm gonna start making phone calls right now."

"Please don't," Misha begged.

"You seriously think I could stand by and do nothing about that?"

"Jensen, please. You know how it gets whenever you try to interfere with the script because of me. Well, because of Cas."

"And how do you think the fandom is gonna react uh? How do you think they'll feel once they realize the show is over and they didn't get to see goodbye to their angel, can you tell me?"

Jensen's eyes had gotten watery, he closed them and took in a deep shaky breath. What was he doing snapping at Misha? This wasn't his fault. "I'm sorry Mish," he apologized in a small voice. He sniffed then swallowed back the lump in his throat. 

"I just don't want anyone to get mad at you because of me."

Despite himself Jensen laughed. "What are they gonna do, fire me?"

"This is no joking matter Jensen, you need to be careful."

"I will," he promised. "Don't you worry about me. I'm gonna fix this okay? You'll be on set with us for the finale."

"Okay."

But he knew Misha wouldn't dare hoping for a change in the script until he saw it with his own eyes. Jensen tried to reassure him one last time before he hung up and started making those calls.

"I've got you Mish."

Someone knocking on the door of his trailer pulled Jensen out of the memory. He quickly wiped his eyes and stood up pretending to busy himself with fixing his normal clothes.

"Come in!"

The door opened and Jared only leaned forward. "We're all ready to go, you coming?"

The crew had decided to reunite somewhere private to celebrate wrapping up the series. Due to Covid-19 going to a restaurant was out of the question but a member of the crew had a close family member who lived near the filming location so they would share a drink at his place.

"Yeah, hum. I've got something to do real quick. I'll be right behind you."

Jared smiled. "Okay. You did a good job today by the way."

Fondness warmed Jensen's green eyes. "Thanks man, you too."

  
  


When Jensen left, it dawned upon him that he would never come back on set to film another episode of Supernatural. He might have spent this entire year mourning his character but the realization still hurt the same. He looked around one last time and whispered a soft "Goodbye Dean Winchester," before getting inside his car.

Because he was feeling sentimental Jensen put on some music. He had made a playlist on his iPod with the same songs as the Led Zeppelin compilation Dean had gifted Castiel with. 

The road was wide and empty, and though he was not driving the Impala he felt a little bit like Dean Winchester. He guessed the feeling would stick around for a while. But he was okay with that. 

When he arrived at destination, the frustration he'd boxed away before going on set came back crashing. He walked up to the door, his vision blurry with tears. It opened before he got to the front steps. Misha must have noticed his car in the driveway. 

"I didn't know you were coming." Concerned filled his voice as he took in Jensen's expression. "Did something go wrong on set?"

Jensen stopped inches close to him. His arms wrapped around Misha's waist, he clung to the embrace as if his life depended on it. Blue worried eyes looked inside of his, two hands cupped his cheeks and Misha pressed their forehead together. 

"Hey, what's wrong?" He repeated.

"You weren't there," was all Jensen could manage before a heart wrenching sob burst out of him. He crashed against Misha's chest who held him tight. 

"I'm sorry love."

"Don't you dare apologize." 

Jensen cried harder. His legs threatened to give in at any time but Misha would not let him fall. He did not suggest they went inside, probably feeling that all Jensen needed right now was for someone to hold him and not let him go. And what better person to do that than the love of his life?

"I hated it Mish," Jensen sobbed against his chest. "Every goddamn second of it I couldn't stop thinking about you. This is just fucking unfair. God, even after twelve years they refused to give you the place you deserve. I can't believe this, I'm—" he choked on his next word, getting too overwhelmed by the maelstrom of emotions battling inside of him, rage, despair, anger, bitterness. This had been a fucking horrible year with the quarantine, hearing news about all those people dying around the world, and black people killed here in the U.S. by the racist police. 

Supernatural was supposed to be the only good thing that happened in the midst of this chaotic 2020 but even that lost its charm because Misha wasn't in the finale. 

"I'm sorry Misha," Jensen said. "I'm sorry they are a bunch of blind assholes who can't see how important you are to the show." 

Misha made soothing circles with his palm on Jensen's back to appease him. "It's okay," he whispered in his ear. "I've got you and I've got the fandom. This is what matters to me."

Jensen looked up, face wet, bloodshot eyes staring into ocean blue. "You're important Mish," he would never stop saying those words. "I love you. The fandom love you." 

They kissed and it tasted like heaven and earth combined.

**Author's Note:**

> This is it guys! Please, let me know what you think :)


End file.
